“They say that each generation thinks it invented love. But from what I can see, my generation seems to fear we’ve forgotten it.” — NYT
Do you go on dates? Or did you? My mom had a boyfriend named Pete; he wore socks with sandals. My dad won't even wear sandals, so it's clear that this wasn't meant to be. Pete happened either before or after she dated Bernie, who, she recalls, was actually attractive. There were dates, which included dinner and movies and dancing. Then my grandfather pulled up in a silver station wagon and whisked her home. There were no preliminary text messages or gin and tonics involved, so I obviously don't relate. (Just kidding). (Kind of).
A new NYTimes essay describes the difference between the perception of love in that generation and that of ours. In high school, instead of shyly passing notes, I printed out AIM conversations. I locked text messages in my phone so that I couldn't accidentally delete them. The saved messages on my phone include voicemails from three different boyfriends. Communication and the consequential intimacy occur so fast that the gradual, step-by-step romance of the past is all but extinct.
The organic chemistry classes at Northwestern were designed to weed out those who weren't dedicated to pre-med. (I'm Exhibit A). Maybe the dates—the coffee, the drinks, the dinner, the goodnight kiss before two people go their separate ways—are a way to weed out the boys who aren't worth it, the guys who don't deserve the goodnight kiss, the preserved conversations that you'll pore over years later, the intact text messages and voicemails. It's a slower and steadier way of developing a relationship, but don't good things come to those who wait? What are your thoughts?
[photo cred here]